Listening without judgment is a noble deed. We assume ourselves to be good listeners and with one sentence whoops! It’s gone. It is rare for someone who has experienced a hard time to not have heard of this sentence.
“Don’t worry. I have gone through something much worse and look! I am fine now”
It gets even more awkward when some people without hesitation judge someone’s mental illness such as depression and anxiety by trying to figure out the causes. Oh, person is suffering depression because of this! That’s obviously poor will, look me as well….. (And so starts the story). It’s like they think they’re giving you their helpful insight even though it really is a sensitive thing to do.
If you start your story, it’s not long you hear “tou? nachon mai?’
First of all, one should refrain themselves from using their own story as motivation to person going through a hard time because usually the person in pain wants to be listened to and not listen to someone else at that point. Further, psychology has come far enough to determine that developing depression or any mental illness merely has to do anything with “poor self-will/power” and everyone needs it imprinted in mind.
SO, Why are some people emotionally more capable of handling some awful experience than others?
Everyone has the tendency of developing a mental illness but everyone reacts differently to external social triggers. The reason for level of intensity has much to do with heredity. An individual does not only inherits facial features, habits, biological diseases but also inherits the susceptibility of mental illness that runs in the family. Secondly, each one us has a different pair of genes mutation called polymorphic genes, it is different even among siblings. These genes mutation are divided into three forms: 1) two short alleles (SS), 2) two long alleles (LL), 3) one short and one long alleles (SL). Through experiments and studies the expert of psychology discipline has interpreted that even if each of these three forms of genes go through the exact same situation the people with SS and SL genes are more likely to develop mental illness than LL genes.
Yeah, so there it is. Genes! Well, where genes play an important role, the specific gene alone is not the cause but it’s interaction with environmental factors along with the severity and time period. To conclude, presence or absence of will power isn’t the only factor contributing to mental illnesses. There are other factors such as genes, environmental factors, time and place which also play a part. So, next time you hear someone has developed a mental illness due to reasons and situations you could have easily handled, remember that you don’t share the exact same gene as that person or even the environment. Adopt a sympathetic attitude not a sick attitude.